For My Best Friend Tiffanie :)

 

A Video For My Fans

It's Just The Beginning ..

Well today marks the fourth day since I've been out of school for Thanksgiving holidays . I've had a lot running through my mind lately, especially him .. I want to know how it feels to find your other half . The one person who's always on your mind and always in your heart . The one person you'll always love and the one person you'll never be able to let go . Maybe i'm too young or maybe the time just isn't right for me . I wish it'd come soon though, i'm getting tired of waiting . I walk around somewhere whether it's school, the mall, or just outside and I see couples everywhere in love . Everybody has somebody and I have no one . It starts to suck after awhile, especially when the worst people end up with someone, it's just not fair at all . Good things always come to good people in the end though . Well anyways, my doctor called earlier this week and told me that my thyroid levels are back up AGAIN -_- . I can't stress to you all how tired I am of being sick all the time . I'll be so glad when I graduate because forcing myself to get out of the bed every morning is getting harder to do everyday . Just 26 more weeks and i'm out of high school :D . I'm ready to graduate but at the same time i'm not . I don't think i'm ready to go out in the real world on my own and transition from high school to college . Everything is happening so fast and I don't know how to slow it down or how to make things better . I just need some help . THIS is my dream: Rafael and he doesn't even know it yet ..
Saturday November 24, 2012 7:11 p.m. CDT

I'm Just Trying To Be Happy ...

Well lately I've seriously been feeling like crap -_- ! I don't know what's wrong with me . It's like I can barely make myself anymore . I have to force myself to smile and laugh every day and it sucks . My last game as a senior was amazing ! We got to make crowns and I made a prettiful one  ^_^ :

I made it out of Burger King crowns they gave us at school and they spray painted them for us . I made my letters and numbers out of the back of spiral notebook && the little snowflakes are actually stickers . I have a picture of me with it on too ! (ignore the rainbow effect lol) :

It was pretty awesome night . I think we lost that game but we just won our playoff game Friday so we have another playoff game this Friday && it's at home ! I might get to go :) . A lot's been going on lately in my life . First off, we're moving !! Mama went && looked at the house the other day . They just have to finish painting it, put the back deck on, put the fence up, && we'll be ready to move on ! We're hoping to move in by the end of the month . Packing is terrible . I have to go through EVERYTHING && throw away everything I don't need or want . Ugh && my Saturdays are gone now thanks to moving . It has two bathrooms thank God ! I don't understand why they made the house we live in now FIVE bedrooms with ONE bathroom . Now they knew good && dang well that wasn't going to work . Stupid architect ! We're supposed to get report cards tomorrow && i'm a bit scared . Rafael better be on that honor roll list too ! He promised me that he was going to be on there this time, if he's not, he might get these hands lol . Right now i'm looking for a job and a way to relieve my stress . I'm going to try yoga soon even though I don't think my body can bend like that anymore . I haven't had P.E. since the 8th grade && i'm in the 12th grade now . Don't be alarmed !! I have it next semester 1st block, I can't graduate without it -_-, stupid rules ! This freaking nitrate plant exploded last night && you could feel && hear the explosion across the river ! I didn't even know we had a nitrate plant around here ! Shows how much Erial knows ... Aha . I've been trying to go to church every Sunday now and I only pray about three or four things: Myself to be happy && healthy, my family, my friends, and someone just for me <3 . I'm going to be starting college soon . Btw, I got accepted into NWSCC && I qualify for a full Pell Grant (financial aid) ! I'm glad that i'm getting ready to start a new chapter in my life but the question is, am I ready for it ? Quote of the Day: "I wish I was strong enought to lift not one, but both of us . Someday I will be strong enough to lift not one, but both of us ."
Wednesday November 14, 2012 9:13 p.m. CDT